


An Assassin's Cry for Freedom

by Hack_Generation



Category: Assassin's Creed
Genre: AU After ACIII, Angst and Feels, Desmond brooding, Feelings, Feels, Gen, Mentor!Desmond???, William actually cares about his son this time, i dont even know what this is anymore, much angst, yeah definitley AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-16
Updated: 2014-08-16
Packaged: 2018-02-13 09:40:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2145978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hack_Generation/pseuds/Hack_Generation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Desmond want's his freedom. He wants to live his own life on his own terms. And it shows in a particular page of his personal journal, discovered by a novice training under him. What does the passage say? Rated M for Language. Slight AU. Angst/Friendship. One-shot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Assassin's Cry for Freedom

**Author's Note:**

> This came out of nowhere from a conversation with PirateWeasel. This is a one-shot, maybe I'll do a part 2.

After the events in Italy. Desmond turns up out of nowhere to say goodbye to Rebecca and Shaun, because he is 100% done with the Brotherhood and wants nothing to do with them anymore. His friends are shocked of course. Both struggling not to look at the bandaged left hand that was burnt but healing slowly. The crisis had been averted and Desmond wanted his freedom,  _his life_  back.

Of course they protested to his leaving. Desmond, naturally as any would do in this predicament, ran away. He left a note behind as well, which was found tied to a throwing knife stuck in Shaun's apartment door. Rebecca had come after the historian's rather irritated yet panicked phone call.

The letter was a wrapped paper around the handle.

* * *

The paper was written with elegant hand writing that both Shaun and Rebecca were surprised that he had that kind of penmanship.

"I know you guys may hate me after this. But I can't do this anymore. I never wanted to be an assassin, I justed wanted to be normal. The need for freedom is something I can't continue to ignore. I had to follow everyone else's orders. Do this Desmond. Lay down Desmond. Pull yourself together Desmond. Don't do this Desmond. Go away. Fetch this bright ass glowing ball named after a stupid fruit, oh and try not to kill anyone with it!

As if things are hard enough than they already are. My mind is still going to shit sometimes. The Bleeding Effect will never fully go away, and I know the dangers if I don't get help. But I can live with it, people work with some kind of handicap everyday. Mine is just mental.

I'm sorry. Really guys. But I just can't. I'm tired of being a tool, some stupid pawn for others to move around. I'm exhausted just like you are.

I'm done. I'm leaving. You can't stop me. For the first time in fucking forever I can do what  _I want._ (Yes Shaun I'm cursing on paper, deal with it smart-ass.) I'm sorry if I'm  _'abandoning the Brotherhood'_ but I did that when I was 16 too. It won't make a difference, I'm still going. I might visit you guys if the Bro-hood doesn't come after me, write you letters and send post cards and pictures from places. Like Hawaii or Jamaica or something. Maybe Canada first when I earn enough to travel.

I'll miss you guys. You're the only friends I have left. Hell the only goddamn family of dysfunctional people that actually give a shit about me and not just for my 'useful-ness' to the Assassins.

Please don't hate me for this. Don't send others after me, or chase me yourselves. Don't worry, I can take of myself. If I'm being selfish I don't care, I can finally focus on my life, my freedom, what  _I want_.

I'm going now. Say goodbye to Dad for me.

-Desmond"

* * *

 

 

Predictably they'd been upset, and when they told William and he read the letter the man was devastated. Shaun and Rebecca warned him against it but William had practically snarled at them "Like Hell! I'm not going to just sit here and lose my son a second time!"

The distraught father had contacted every assassin he knew of, even other branches in different parts of the world to look for his son and persuade him to come back.

Suffice to say Desmond hadn't been happy when they found him working at a bar in Jamaica. He had tried to lose the assassin trailing him, but an ambush by Jamaican assassins threw him for a loop. Last he had heard was that there was no branch of the Brotherhood in Jamaica. Apparently that info was dead wrong. He got dragged all the way to Canada, which was where he'd sent his last post card to Rebecca, the techie had informed him in a letter written entirely in binary code that she and Shaun had stayed together and moved to Canada with his father.

Desmond was pissed off at all three of them, until the Jamaican that had trailed him said it was William that sent almost the entire Brotherhood searching for him. Desmond was still mad and ready to yell at his father for stealing his freedom a second time in his life when he most needed it. But his words were the same he said to Shaun and Rebecca, only it was directed at Desmond with mournful eyes to accompany it. "I'm not losing you a second time Desmond."

In the end, he'd been guilt-ed and shanghaied into being sent to Japan with Rebecca and Shaun for training novices for the Brotherhood. However it wouldn't be all day, everyday. He actually was given a small bit of freedom , so Desmond was able to set up his own schedule to train the fledglings. Taking them on night runs through the city and pointing things out to them.

* * *

Desmond became more withdrawn during night training with small teams of novices. No one could pinpoint why. What was going on in Desmond's thoughts? Nobody knew, and none wanted to get into trouble for asking. So they kept silent. Watching him brood and leaving him be.

* * *

One novice, named Vincent; being curious and slightly nosy, had found Desmond's journal. His friends had nominated him to do it, everyone was curious and wanted to know if their Mentor really had a journal. It was also a bet, whoever could stealth their way into Mentor Desmond's room and get out undetected would automatically be...well... cool and looked up to. Vincent had agreed to it, because he hadn't done anything yet to prove himself to the other novices, he also hadn't attempted anything from the time he was first taken under the Mentor's wing to now because of how sad he looked. Vincent thought if he listened and was a good novice; getting on his teachers good side would help Vincent attempt to make him happy.

But now? He was just dying to know what was in it just like everyone else.

All the novices that Desmond trained possessed a journal, saying that "Writing is a way to help with problems you don't want others to see, or need help dealing with." None of the novices ever saw him with his own, even though they sometimes shared their entries, he did tell them he had one.

It was  exciting that he actually found it in the large book shelf of the bedroom, hidden behind an Encyclopedia Britannica. The boy slowly pulled it out, trying to not make any noise, he memorized the way it was hidden so he could leave it exactly like it was when he came in. None would be the wiser. Vincent climbed into the rafters of Desmond's large room and began to read a page that the book opened up to. The current date.

_September 19th, 2011_

_9:00 PM_

_Osaka, Japan._

 

_They say that if you close your eyes,_

_everything feels normal._

_Everything feels like the way it was before._

 

_But when I close mine,_

_all I feel is the need to escape through a portal._

 

_One that will never come._

 

_When I close my eyes,_

_it's easy to remember my past._

 

_However, none of it is good._

_Not a damn thing._

 

**_Most of it isn't even my own memories._ **

 

_Sometimes when I'm alone and I watch the cities below me,_

_when the wind blows my face like a soft caress._

 

_Sometimes when I stand there and take it all in,_

_watching the pretty lights below,_

_seeing people walk by **without a care**  in the world._

 

_I long to be part of it._

_So I'll dream,_

_I'll imagine._

 

_Being part of the ignorance that sets them apart from me,_

_unaware that someone just like them is miserable and suffering._

_Scared and always on the run,_

_hiding like a fucked up little mouse._

 

 _Even though the mouse is armed with_ _a Hidden Blade._

 

_When I stand on a rooftop and look below,_

_I can imagine **being there**  with them._

 

_Flowing with the pretty lights and city sights._

_And when I do imagine these things,_

_it becomes an escape from reality._

 

_Walking with the crowd and blending with them occasionally helps that escape._

_Because I can forget for awhile that I'm **lonely**._

_I can pretend I'm part of the moving mass of physical energy. I can pretend I'm just a civilian visiting the country, and not the teacher of a bunch of kids who didn't have a choice in the matter of wanting a normal life._

 

_For a second everything seems alright,_

_but it isn't..._

_And I know **my life**  doesn't turn out to be,_

_the fairy-tale dream that **I**  wanted it to be or see._

 

 _I_ _t all comes crashing down with a single touch,_

_a reminder of reality._

 

_Spotting an enemy ruins it all._

_My Eagle Vision automatically comes out,_

_I didn't even want to turn it on._

 

_It breaks the peace I want._

_So I run._

_No matter how much it hurts,_

_no matter how much I will or will not admit this to myself,_

_or others._

 

_No matter how much **I don't want it**._

 

_Reality creeps in._

_It sinks into my body like dead weight,_

_settling in my bones._

 

_Making me feel cold and empty and useless,_

_my head full of knowledge of what I'll never have,_

_what I'll never be what **I want**  to be._

_And then I know,_

**_painfully._ **

**They have a good life while I don't.**

The novice had a feeling of melancholy from reading the passage. Perhaps he would ask Mentor Desmond about it later. Or not at all, especially with how sad the whole thing felt, the fact that he didn't want to be an Assassin astonished Vincent. He felt sorry for Desmond, because his parents actually asked him if he wanted to be an Assassin. Of course Vincent said yes, but the journal showed that there was a possibility that the Brotherhood wasn't all it was chalked up to be. It was probably something no one, even himself, was supposed to see. So he put the book back exactly how he remembered it and sneaked out the window the way he had come in.

As he climbed down the wall the novice decided that he would keep the journal entry to himself. He vowed he'd never tell a soul what he'd read or seen. Vincent decided he was going to lie and say he couldn't find it and nearly got caught. They'd believe his fib, he was sure of it. Besides, nobody went around telling their friends about _his_ business and he doubted the Mentor had any, it sounded mean but he never saw Desmond go out anywhere or even talk to the people he knew. The Mentor never smiled either. The journal entry would be kept private.

 

Maybe, just maybe he could help the Mentor be happy, like Rebecca and Shaun wanted him to be. Vincent grinned at the idea,  unknowing that a certain someone had been watching with a faint smile on his scarred lips.

**Author's Note:**

> I also have works on FF.net if you want to check them out they are under the same name but without the under score  
> Hack Generation at ff.net!
> 
> Leave review below to tell me what you liked/disliked about this one-shot and if you want part 2


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